


lonely

by LordLoozer



Category: Hunter X Hunter
Genre: Hurt No Comfort, M/M, also a mention of death/bleeding out, teen rating because there is two cuss words, vent fic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-02-08
Updated: 2020-02-08
Packaged: 2021-02-27 18:33:34
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 837
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22620274
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LordLoozer/pseuds/LordLoozer
Summary: Sometimes the loneliness is too much for Leorio to handle.
Relationships: Kurapika/Leorio Paladiknight
Kudos: 30





	lonely

**Author's Note:**

> yo this was kinda outta my comfort zone, i don't usually write stuff like this so. hope ya like it.

Leorio knows that he’s lonely. He’s accepted it. A lonely college student. Sure, he’s got a few drinking buddies and some friends from study groups (It’s not like those are the people he really wants to hear from.), but Leorio is so lonely. Fridays are usually like this, he lets out all the stress of the week in the form he is most comfortable with. Resting. Normally he doesn’t have this feeling of intense loneliness biting at his back. Leorio attempts to push down the selfish thought. His head pounds as he reaches for his phone on the nightstand to check the time. The tight feeling around his head growing worse every second. Leorio grimaces as he turns on his phone, it’s too bright. Way too bright. He reads the time, 8:23. He shuts his phone off immediately after and slams it down, turning the other way. Leorio stretches his legs out, pulls the blanket around him tighter and squeezes his eyes shut.

He lays there for moments, listening to the soundtrack of the rain pelting his dorm window. Leorio feels his mind begin to wander. The sound of the rain leading him into thoughts of blonde hair that smells like rain and coffee, the most intense scarlet he’s ever seen in his life, and the way this wonder of a man always countered Leorio’s impulsiveness with his own level headedness. Leorio pulls the blanket tighter around his tired body, he can feel something welling up in his chest. The questions return, _What if he’s_ _dead? What if he’s all by himself as he slowly bleeds out somewhere? Does he think of me like I think of him?_ Before he knows it his face is hot with tears, he lets out a quiet sob and sniffs. The tears don’t stop as Leorio thinks of the countless phone calls and texts he sends. _Why won’t he just answer the damn phone?_ He scolds himself for feeling like this. _He doesn’t care about you, why the hell are you still stuck on him?_ His body racks with sobs now, he holds himself. Maybe he’s trying to squeeze himself out of existence, maybe he’s trying to comfort himself. He can’t think straight. All he can think about is how much he misses Kurapika. He wants him here so bad, he wants to touch his hair and hold him. He wants to extend his hand and tell him “Everythings going to be alright.”

Leorio knows it isn’t all alright, he knows the importance of Kurapika’s mission but damn. He just wishes so badly that he would let someone help him. He turns his face into his pillow and screams. It feels like a toddler is having a temper tantrum in his head right now. Like a child is beating on his skull. The feeling worsens as he lets out a tension filled scream. He can’t help but feel like this. He wishes so bad that Kurapika didn’t think so lowly of himself. He wishes that Kurapika didn’t hold himself as a weapon of revenge. Leorio knows he is so so much more than that. Leorio wishes so awfully Kurapika was here. He turns again to reach for his phone and finds it in the dark, he turns it on. He looks at the time again, once again grimacing from the light. 8:46, he frowns and sniffs. The tears dry on his face, he unlocks his phone and goes to the messenger app. He checks his and Kurapika’s dms. He looks at the hundreds of texts he’s sent. _I passed another test today! I doubt you care but I just wanted to let you know. Hey Kurapika, I haven’t heard from you in a while, just wanted to know how you’re doing._ Leorio feels the tears starting again. _Kurapika please answer me. Kurapika please just let me know that you’re okay._

He turns off his phone and lets it fall to the ground. The clatter of his phone on the ground makes him flinch but he doesn’t care. He hurts all over and he wishes he weren’t alone. He sits up very slowly and carefully, throwing back the covers slowly. He swings his legs around and he feels his feet hit the floor. Leorio stumbles towards his briefcase and opens it, from it he pulls out a bottle. He squints in the dark, making sure that the label is correct. Children’s Ibuprofen. Zepile laughs at him for taking it but this shit works wonder for headaches. He unscrews the cap and chugs some. Leorio coughs a bit and puts the cap back on, placing the bottle back into his briefcase.He stumbles back over to his bed and throws himself into it. He pulls the covers over his lanky form and takes a deep breath in, hoping to quiet the raging storm in his head. He feels himself drift away, sleep taking him into it’s open arms. Leorio’s final thought before sleeping, only four simple words. _I love you Kurapika._

**Author's Note:**

> thnks 4 reading, any feedback is appreciated :]
> 
> i be like: *projects onto leorio*


End file.
